Why Yes, We Are Bored. Thanks For Asking!

As another sign that we've all been on this tour too long, there is a growing hobby among the crew. I couldn't tell you when it started, but it's become quite a spectacle for the odd afternoon.

One of those afternoons was our first day in Ft. Myers. There was a large parking lot on one side of the building next to a lake. There was a slight breeze blowing west to east, so conditions were perfect. After the afternoon sound check, the crew gathered. People were roused from their afternoon nap, and the parade moved out to the parking lot.

A semi circle formed around a small parking berm, where the launcher was set. Boxes were set down and model rockets began to appear. Cars full of people coming for the evening show, slowed to watch the spectacle. Staff members from the arena gathered at a distance. Model rocket enthusiasts (or bored crew people with too much per diem), prepped the motors on their sky bound models. The crowded murmured, quiet in discussion. Was the wind going to be a factor? This is the maiden voyage for the Van Halen rocket, will it survive? Will we loose the rockets in the sun? The anticipation in the air thickened with every passing moment.

And it began. The leads were attached to the engine, the cable run out, and the safety switch turned off. A constant audible whine could be heard. The rocket was in final countdown.



Woosh! off it went into the deep blue sky. Heads all turned skyward as the rocket took off to the west into the wind. The trail of smoke turned into a puff as the rocket split apart and the retrieval parachute opened. All eyes followed the downward path as the rocket floated to earth, bobbing left and right eventually landing 100 yards away.

The spectacle continued. More people gathered, including one sheriff's patrol car to watch as rockets were launched. Some successfully retrieved, others not so much.

The finale for the afternoon approached. A small yellow port-a-john model was fashioned into a rocket. The crowd was 3 people thick waiting for the launch of "Poop 1" into the great beyond. The port-a-john was carefully checked and re-checked, the engine was secure. The leads clamped securely. Angle and wind checked and double checked. The launch pad was ready. Mission control was on line. The safety switch flipped and the low whine permeated the air.


But "Poop 1" was top heavy, and arched no higher than 20 feet before finally coming to rest in front of a parked car. The parachute deployed the moment it hit the ground. The crowd squealed with laughter! People standing in line to pick up their tickets stood there dumb founded at the near miss. "Poop 1" was retrieved and brought back to the launch pad. It was checked for defects. "Poop 1" appears ready for a second launch... But on another day.

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