By the time we landed in Lagos, everyone in the band and crew had read or heard about the reviews of this hotel on-line.
“The Lagos SUPERDUMP,” One review opened with, “The rooms in this hotel is bordering on a set from a Quentin Tarantino movie. (Example - the ceiling in the bathroom caved in while I was showering.)”
“So it’s true, this hotel is really that bad,” Starts another, “The main problem is as also described in other reviews, they have renovated some rooms but significant portion is still not renovated, and the non renovated rooms are flat out awful, worst I've seen so far. These rooms smell, damp with humidity. The toilet from upstairs leaked to my bathroom.”
According to the website:
“Eko Hotel & Suites is the most prestigious international hotel in Lagos, strategically positioned near the heart of Nigeria’s economic activity. Built on the exclusive Victoria Island, the Hotel is spread over three buildings and has spectacular views of the Atlantic Ocean and the Kuramo Lagoon. Surrounded by beautiful gardens and magnificent African landscaping, Eko Hotel & Suites is the place to stay when in Lagos for business or for recreation.”
Atlantic Ocean? Kuramo Lagoon? Magnificent African landscaping? Guess my room was a little to low in the hotel for any kind of view. But that turned out to be a good thing, as you’ll soon read. Whenever I visit websites or reviews about hotels on-line, I know to keep in the back of my head that, on tour, the group bookings, especially for the crew, will be in the cheapest rooms, with the view of the parking lot. It’s more about the common areas that make a hotel nice.
The lobby of the Eko Hotel and Suites is a large open air affair with registration and elevators to the right and shopping to the left. Down the middle are two staircases that lead down to the open air bar, restaurants, and pool area.
Aside from the stifling heat and the “nuts to butts” people in the lobby (is all of Lagos this crowded?) It looked like it was a nice hotel. Dark wood trim around the reception desk, red and gold carpeting, nice comfortable lobby furniture, not bad.
The crew began piling into the elevators and fanning out to our perspective rooms. I was hoping, fingers crossed, that I’d be getting one of the “renovated” rooms. After all, the first show of this little tour in Monte Carlo was a wedding for the daughter of the owner of the Eko Hotel and Suites. Gotta hook us up right?
Wrong. I was in one of the older rooms. When I first walked in the room was not bad at all. Aside from the hard tile floor (emerald green), the bed and furnishings were nice to look at. And it's smell wasn't offensive. It was a bit musty, but what do you expect when it's probably 100 percent humidity in the city all year long?
I propped by bag up on the valet stand, kicked on the A/C to high, and flew open the drapes to see the view in the photo above. That’s cool I don’t need a view, I just need a TV with something in English other than CNN. I grabbed the remote and went to plunk down on the bed.
They never described how the beds in the TV show, The Flintstones, felt. But this bed was what I would imagine Fred and Wilma shared. It was solid. Little to no bounce in the mattress what so ever. I was hoping that it was like a Tempurpedic mattress with the memory foam and I would eventually sink in and be comfortable. Well, this memory foam has forgotten. It never got softer. May as well turn on the TV.
Thankfully, the official language of Nigeria is English, so the TV was full of English language channels, most piped in from South Africa. As I surfed around the TV, my eyes finally surfed around the room. And yes, it was bad. Above the desk was a long crack that ran from the ceiling to the floor, the lower corner of the wall between the bathroom and the room was damp and bubbling. There were leak stains in the ceiling. I figured I’d better stand up and check the bathroom before I get comfortable and realize they forgot to install a shower.
The bathroom was fine. Reasonable sized tub, clean toilet and sink. As a quick aside, if anyone reading this is planning to build or invest in a hotel, I have one complaint about most of them, not enough counter space in the bathrooms. Keep in mind, when you travel you keep all your toiletries in a little bag that you have to expand out onto a counter or some sort of raised surface to access your toothbrush. More counter space Mr. and Mrs. hotel builder please.
I thought about all the reviews on line and came to a realization. This room isn’t all that bad. If you take into account the abject poverty just 100 yards outside the hotel walls. I should be thankful that I have this amount of comfort. Granted if this hotel were in New York or L.A., I would immediately be out the door and to the front desk for another room. But in Lagos, it’s nice digs.
Then, the power went out. And not just the lights and the TV, everything went out. Phones went dead, the A/C stopped blowing. It was already mid evening and the sun had set. I carry a flashlight in my carry on for just such emergencies. I pulled it out, and turned it on.
As I panned around the room, there came a scratching at the door to the bathroom. I opened it up and in the low light, I could see the glowing of many eyes. I slowed raised my flashlight to reveal, a pack of hyenas in my bathroom, starting the coffee pot and making tea. “Do you mind?” Said one of them, “We’re just getting, up!” Hyenas are nocturnal creatures you see…
Alright, that last paragraph didn’t happen, but this story was getting a little long winded and I should let you folks rest and absorb before I tell you about the next 24 hours.
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